Disclaimer: I am not a doctor. I do not have medical training. The last science class I took was approximately 30 years ago, and I mostly remember the teacher’s neckties. This blog is based on my experience, conversations, and research with actual medical professionals. Please consult your own doctor before trying any medications or supplements. Seriously. Don’t say I sent you.
I’ve heard a lot of men tell me menopause is going to be “awful.” I’ve also noticed how many people seem deeply concerned for my husband because I’m going through it. As if he’s the one in danger.
Men say plenty of questionable things, but nothing quite compares to a man—without a medical degree—confidently explaining women’s reproductive health to me. You think perimenopause is going to be rough? Fascinating. Please, tell me more—right after you walk me through your last period. Or better yet, the last 35 years of periods, bloating, cramps, and surprise mood swings. I’ll wait.
No, I don’t expect perimenopause to be a breeze. I’m not delusional. I fully expect some chaos. My mom was right—life isn’t fair. If it were, women would gently float into this stage like retired swans. Instead, it often feels like I’m piloting a slowly sinking sailboat, powered by coffee, optimism, and whatever metabolism I used to have.
Social media, of course, has solutions. Stressed? Take cortisol supplements. Tired? Mushrooms will fix that. Wondering if menopause is near? For only $99 a month, you can test your hormones and spiral in real time. Problem solved.
Here’s the less fun part: even though women make up about half the world’s population, women’s health—especially perimenopause—has been wildly under‑researched. Every woman will go through it, yet it’s barely covered in medical training and has shockingly little dedicated research.
What we do know is that estrogen affects pretty much everything. Somewhere in our late 30s or early 40s, it starts fluctuating like it’s experimenting with a new personality. These changes can happen week to week. Sometimes daily. Sometimes just to keep things interesting. And there’s no definitive test for perimenopause because hormone levels are constantly changing—today’s data is tomorrow’s joke.
All of this is happening while many of us are managing careers, raising kids, caring for aging parents, and trying not to doom‑scroll ourselves into oblivion. It’s a lot. But at least we’re going through it together—and laughing when we can.
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